Yes, I have become an angry man. The people close to me have been unfortunately made to bear with my tempers flaring. I am really sorry for venting my anger at them but I am baffled myself by my behavior.
I don't know what is happening to me. One day I feel as light as a bird and the next day, I feel as heavy as a stone. My emotions are on a roller coaster ride. Am I going crazy?
I feel tired and demotivated at work. I get frustrated easily and lose my temper. There is little joy in the things that I used to like doing. My health is not in good shape due to stress. Even after going for a holiday I felt slightly better but then I feel guilty for being slightly happy. My emotions are struggling to make sense.
Is this depression? Or am I losing my mind?
Why am I angry? Is it because I didn't do enough for mom? Maybe because I could have possibly prevented her death? I am angry at my relatives for throwing away mom's belongings just after the funeral? Mad at myself for believing them? Angry at myself for not realizing she was seriously unwell? Work stress?
I really miss mom a lot and feel like crying at times. But I forced myself not to, should I? Could this turn to anger?
Am I punishing myself?
I just hope I can come out of this.
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